What the Blog

I have the most adorable puppy ever. Her name is Bella, well actually its Princess Bella Donna Versace, but since I am poor I have never sent in the AKC papers and we just call her Bella. Bella is 5 months old and she is a minature long haired dachshund.
I have noticed a very nasty habit recently. Two separate events, two separate baths, two separate grossies.....

Last night when I took Bella outside she was enthralled with a particular patch of leaves (there are a ton of fucking leaves outside, but only one spot she was interested in), so instead of going potty she wanted to eat these damn leaves, and in refusing to drop them as I commanded (she very good at ignoring me), I went to yank them out of her mouth.....EEEEWWWEEE what the fuck? EEEEWWWWEEEE its *gasp* shit, from another dog???possibly a oppossum???? Its on my hand, YUCK - I run up the stairs straight to the bathroom and put Bella in the tub and scrub my fucking hands and then Bella gets scrubbed into a shiny new clean puppy :)

Let me also insert here that our dryer has not been working correctly (The little things that make life suicidal) of course this was discovered after Kallay washed a load of laundry, as of today that is now fixed :) Yeah, so like the good roomie I am, I walk into the laundry room/office to rewash the load of "wet" now mildewed dried laundry of Kals and to my horror what do I discover running though the basket of clothes??? A fucking Palmetto Bug!!! In Tennessee, not South Carolina or Florida like you would expect -
this is what one of them look like:

Yep Nasty little fuckers and they can FLY and ATTACK YOU! So I did what any person would do. I screeched my head off and who comes to the rescue? Bella the attack dachshund, all hyperactive 9 pounds of her to investigate what the fuck is going on. She sniffed at it, pawed at it, chewed at it some, then picked it up and carried it into MY bedroom where she proceed to eat part of it and then decided to roll around in its carcass, Guh-fucking-ross!

Apparently this is common of my puppies breed, they like to "mask" their sent with "prey" so they can hunt better....hmmmm....so ya, she got another bath, nasty little puppy! But I still love her, even though she is 100% grosser than both my cats combined....