What the Blog

Its like this never ending cycle of happiness and misery...

One day is complete and utter happiness and everything is all bright & shiny and then the next day something awful happens and everything becomes all dark and twisty.

I personally think that the dark & twisty is following me around and no matter how optimistic I try to be it is going to eventually catch up with me.  I know that I sound paranoid as I write this but I can pinpoint all the times this is the case in my life. 

So here I am, currently in the bright & shiny, I am waiting with anticipated breath hoping against hope that the dark & twisty is going to stay away and not ruin my happiness.  I am doing my very best to concentrate on the happiness, but in the back of my head I know that the other shoe is going to drop and I am just going to want to scream and cry.

I feel like at 32 I should have my shit together, last year at 31 I did.  And then in April my life just fell apart.  I got married and within 2 weeks of being married, my idiotic husband decided that even though I can't have kids, he was going to try and convince me that I want kids (I don't and never did and my tubes are tied so I can't), his bright idea of the way to do that was to point a loaded weapon at me, after fighting all night and told me not to make him jumpy.  WTF.....

So I did what any sane person does, I called KPD, they put him in jail and I moved out the next day and into my sisters house, and pressed charges against him.

I had to go to court on Friday to testify against my in my heart but not legally ex husband on behalf of the state of TN.  The DA charged him with aggravated assault with intention (this is a felony charge and can carry 3-15 years in prison if convicted) and then they offered him a plea of the lesser charge of domestic violence assault with 2 years of supervised probation and the loss of his right to bear arms and no contact with me, he took the plea.

I feel kind of let down about this... I feel like he should have served hard time for what he did, but realistically I know that is not how the justice system works.  They have to save room in the prison population for repeat drug offenders, because you can always get out when it comes to violent crimes... I am very disillusioned about the entire ordeal and can honestly say I understand WHY it is so hard for women to get away from an abusive partner. 

As a side note, I still do not have an official "order of protection" from Knox County, the reason being is that my Ex refused the terms of it and his attorney is a scumbag who never shows up for court in person and sends some peon from his office to go to court, two times we have been to court on this and still it just keeps getting pushed back.  I am going to write to congress about this because its pure bullshit that its so difficult to get an order of protection against someone who pointed a loaded weapon at me for not having the ability to have children....  And now I have to fight him to just get a divorce, its completely ridiculous what you have to go through in this state if you are a victim of domestic violence.

Anyways I am happy because of "D", everything is going well with us, he is a total sweetheart :) and I am happy because of my new job, I absolutely kick ass at my new job :)

Till Next Time,
T.